Some of Them

So, I don't think I'm dating until I go out on a date.  My friend has made me promise that I am not to go out on any dates or meet ups without her.  She says that she will be the woman by the plants... EVERY SINGLE TIME!!!  I love her. 

There are dating apps that you look at the profiles and I'm like, "What am I looking at?"  I have to ask myself, "Is this what I want?"  I do this for each profile I come across.  I don't want to be one of those shallow people so I read the profiles.  On some of the dating apps, all of the men that I come across have really sweet profiles.  They are all very nice.  You should know that I have absolutely nothing against nice men.  I like nice men.  I eat them for lunch with ketchup but they are usually very tasty.  I'm kidding... a little bit.  I'm kidding but most of it is true.

I met this guy before Santi.  I won't tell you his name to protect the innocent.  He was a really nice guy.  He took me to this work thing and I met his boss.  I think I liked him.  I know he liked me.  So what happened?  HE WAS REALLY NICE!!!  We got in the car and I don't know what happened but I rolled my eyes at him.  He stopped the car.  Then he turns to me and tells me that he doesn't appreciate my attitude.  I promise you that in my heart I laughed so hard.  I rolled my eyes.  What was he going to do when I got really mad?  I knew it then.  He was too nice.

Some apps are better than others.  I like the ones you swipe.   For a while there I was trying to make a match with the ones I didn't want and I was rejecting the ones that I wanted.  Apparently I confused MY right and MY left.  I love reading the profiles.  I think this is my favorite thing.  It's not all about the looks.  It is a little about the looks.  OKAY!  Looks have a lot to do with it!!!  More importantly, it has to do with that unspoken thing where you just... know.  I read on one of the profiles this guy that wrote something like, "Please look like your profile.  If not, we are drinking until you do."  That was the best thing that I read.

I didn't think this whole thing through either.  What if they ask me out?  I will have to find a place with plants so my friend could hide.  I will have to meet with them and make... pleasant small talk!!!  Does it have to be pleasant?  Do I have to smile?   Can I just say "No" when they sit down if I know right away?  I have the perfect way to say no.  I'll smile sweetly and ask, "So, when can we start planning the wedding?"  LOL!!!  Too evil?  I'll let you know if I have to use it.  

Some of the sites allow you to put WIDOW in your profile.  I think this is helpful.  One of the sites doesn't and this one guy sent me a message.  He ended up asking me about my last relationship and why we broke up.  I was nice as I explained I was a widow.  I think someone else would just be like Oh and leave. 

Then, there is this app that people message.  Messaging is strange and hard to do.  I'm suppose to say something to you?  I know like three things about you.  I also don't want to say anything that can be misconstrued.  Already I have gotten in trouble talking about the Phoenix weather and it being hot...  I had to go back to my post to see how it could have been twisted.  I saw it then.  I suck!  I'm learning a lot about myself too, other than I suck.  I'm learning that I don't really like meeting new people online.  Already I'm tired.  I may have to look up some events to go to in person.  I'm better in person.  I may have to save up for Events and Adventures.

So far, no dates.  I'm relieved.  Dating could be like car shopping.  You look and look but you don't really have the money to buy until you are ready to buy.  I'm not online dating, I'm man shopping and comparing prices.  Just kidding.  I'm taking it day by day.  God is still in control and He is sovereign.  I'm not stressing at all.  If dating were like car shopping, I am a older model vintage car that runs well but that may need body work.  I know that I'm not the latest model of Tesla or even Honda but I run well and I'm reliable.  I need to find someone who has an appreciation for vintage cars, that's all.  This will not be everyone.  This is a niche crowd.  I'm okay with this.  I am sure to attract a particular clientele.  I don't need several owners.  I lost control of this metaphor so I'm going to stop.

So far, some of the guys are nice.  I'm relieved.  Some guys have reached out to me.  If I don't meet someone, I'm okay with it.  If I do, I'm good with it too.  Part of me thinks that I may not want to date, maybe I just want a guy best friend.  You know, someone to go to a movie that is isn't just me and the kids.  May be I just want to go dancing and know that someone has my back.  I don't know.  I think I may need a friendship.  Well, that's all for now.  Just thinking about things.