Sunday, November 17, 2019

To the Guys on Dating Apps

I go through a lot of profiles.  I'm laughing because they remind me of watching the American Idol auditions. A lot of them are really bad and really bad can be really entertaining.  My kids have this thing where they are like, "Mom, don't be cringey."  It means not to do anything to embarrass them or to make them cringe.  They are tweens and teens so I'm always doing something "cringey" but these guys make me look like an amateur.

So... smile in your pictures.  I don't care if you don't like to smile!!!  Smile. I need to see your teeth!!!  I'm not kidding!  Smile in most of the pictures.  Don't make your first picture one without a shirt.  What are you selling?  Don't take pictures with sunglasses on.  The eyes are the windows to your soul.  Take one pic full body.  If I can do it, then you can do it too.  Definitely put one with pets, not just of your pets.  How do I know if they are really yours if you aren't in the picture?  I hate it when you have more than one pic with a bunch of other people.  Because a lot of you are friends with some good looking people.  If you are really good looking, you should put one with you looking goofy.  You intimidate people with all of that prettiness.  Besides, we girls should be the pretty ones.  Have one with your kids but not all of them should be of your kids.  I have one with my kids.  We are a package deal.

Okay so now on to profiles.  Put a profile up.  This means, WRITE SOMETHING!!! I like longer ones.  I hate when it is just all pictures.  I read the whole profile.  I think women like more information not less.  We aren't men!!!  Do I even need to tell you to spellcheck!!!  I mean, reread what you write and maybe have a friend (a woman friend) read it over for you.  I think it is cool to be clear about what you want.  I like it when the app does it for you but if it doesn't then you need to be clear.  Don't say Christian if you aren't.  That goes for women and men.  If  you are unsure, go to a church and talk to someone.

Okay guys!!!  Most guys I know are not overly optimistic... until it comes to online dating.  All of sudden they want to go for women that they would never approach in real life.  Is this why online shopping is so popular?  People buying stuff they would never buy in a store?  I don't know.  I think this is a post for another day.  I do it too... incidentally.  I go for guys that are a few levels higher than me.  But then again, I have a lot of personality to back up my optimism so there is that.

A note on ghosting: I hate ghosting but there's this thing that happens where a conversation drops.  You find someone else or there is a lack of communication from the other side and I'm waiting and you may be waiting too.  Here is the thing.  You are the GUYS!!!  In the grand scheme of things, I think that you guys should be doing the pursuing and we should be considering.  I understand that rejection is hard.  Try waiting for you guys to wake up.  Me?  I want to be pursued.  Maybe I want to be convinced.  Online dating is hard.  It is.  Understand that a lot of times, I'm waiting for you to do the next move.  I mean, HELLO!!! Then again, maybe I'm being harsh.  I understand that I may be an Alpha Female waiting for a true Alpha Male.  Then again, the better wait is on God to lead someone to me, if ever.  I may be waiting for the rest of my life and not find someone.  That's okay too.

Hope this was helpful!

1 comment:

  1. Oh Elle.. I'm going through the perils of online dating as well. Overall, lots of fun but a lot of BS too. I totally agree with you regarding being the one who is pursued. I hate putting in their effort.. it makes me resentful. I think people's attention spans are way too short for the most part. Just trying to go with the flow and maintain my integrity.