I did a bad job remembering today. It helped that it was a Friday and I didn't have a lot of paperwork to remind me of the date. Today I went to church for the Chili Cook off. I didn't cook. I had intended to make some gluten free corn bread but I was missing an hour. Instead I came empty handed and hung out till the very end without even thinking about helping.
Janet was wearing a flannel of her dad's. I felt the need to wear something too. I wore a shirt of his that he bought but didn't really wear because although he loved the shirt, it was on the small side for him. So I wore it today. I didn't explain that I was wearing my late husband's shirt because it was his death day and not because I am a fan of Pink Floyd. I only know the "Money" song from The Italian Job.
David, David didn't do anything. His birthday was on Thursday. I want him to just remember and appreciate his birthday. He tells me that he will never forget. I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing. I want his birthday to be a good thing. Yesterday we cut a cake. I got him a t-shirt and a few of his favorite foods. His wish was really a gift for me. He prayed for good things to come. Is he really this mature? I'm happy when he's just a silly kid.
Next week, we will take time out and go out to eat and have some distance for David's birthday this year. We will go shopping and eat good food where he wants. Maybe we will do our Dave and Buster's thing and do that with his sister. When I look at his pictures, I will always remember. I remember him all of the time. I loved the way that he loved me and I miss him. I don't know if it will always hurt. It hurts less now. I think he would have wanted it that way. Here is to remembering.
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