Tuesday, August 18, 2020

Humanity and Defenses

I have been thinking about kindness.  It's easy to become selfish when you are in a struggle.  In fact, it is in our human nature to develop a defense mechanism.  It isn't right, however, it is understandable to do this.  When we become vulnerable, we go into defense mode and then... Human nature with its complexity and nuances emerges and takes over in a situation.  Kindness, in part, has to do with repressing the human nature and understanding how people react with human nature to a situation.  I'm wondering how this affects relationships and the world we live in.  

I hate to talk about this but I will for the sake of the point.  My son just recently started high school.  He was in an orientation class and many of the students were making bad choices, horrible choices in fact.  I came in.  He did not participate verbally to contribute the bad situation, however, I learned later that he did participate in aggravating the situation through chat.  The data had been recorded.  He did not make a bad situation better.  When he was confronted, his humanity came out.  He was defensive on all fronts.  His argument started like this: "Yes, I didn't make the best choices BUT..." That "but" negates the first premise.  I understand it as attempting to be the exception and not the rule.  Regardless of how he followed through on the argument, he is not accepting his role in the matter.  This is humanity.  

I do the same things!!!  Maybe he learned it from me.  I was disappointed in my son's stance but I understood and he was sorry for his part in the matter but he kept on saying things like, "Did everyone else get a consequence or am I the only one?"  This is a refusal to take ownership.  "At least I didn't talk and yell like the others."  This is comparison.  My son is 14 years old.  I have 4 years yet to work on his character with God's help.  You see, God teaches kindness.  

If I were the daughter or the wife of a rich man, I could afford to be generous with money because we have enough and money is not an idol that I have to save up and serve (There are some rich people that have more than enough but could never afford to be generous because money is their god.).  Well, I can afford to love because I am the daughter of the God Who is Love so I don't have to worry about running out.  Because of this, I can afford to be kind.  My defenses lies with the God who fights my battles and the more that I trust Him, the more I can reflect Him because He provides for me.  

My humanity still gets in the way but I can see how my humanity is rooted in sin.  The conflict in this world is between choosing who we are over God and how He made us to be without the curse of sin upon us.  We chose this curse for ourselves and now we get to live with the consequences.  As stubborn children, we pretend that this choice was the right choice.  At this point in time, I will respectfully disagree.  God is good, Friends.  Believe in His goodness.  Praise the Lord!

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