Wednesday, July 29, 2020

The Person I Used to Be

I have always had a lot of clothes.  I like having a lot of options.  But I am finding as I go through the clothes, that there are different versions of me and some of those versions just don't exist anymore.  I was looking at this turquoise long sleeved t-shirt with a glitter butterfly.  Yes, it was in my clothing inventory.  I had more than one...  Who wore these shirts?  Are these my shirts?  Yes, yes, they are my shirts.  I had to look at them.  I don't want to be the kind of person that wears hard cotton long sleeved glitter t-shirts.  Did you know that I am almost 50 years old?  I found myself asking if some of my clothes were my children's clothes.  That's how you know.  

I went to the closet.  I have dresses that have been there for longer than I thought I would.  My daughter fits into some of my clothes!!!  She says she likes shopping in my closet.  She's the same shoe size as I am.  (Just to be clear, Janet his not my size in clothes.  She likes to wear her clothes big and some of them were just hopeful purchases.)

I get to figure out who I am right now.  What are the parts of me that are still me?  What are the parts of me that I think I would like to change?  I understand this concept as I go around shopping with my daughter who is also figuring out her identity.  I can see who she is wanting to be (it looks a lot like who I wanted to be when I was her age thanks to trends that keep coming up and won't die).  I am looking at some of my dresses; some of those dresses I wore because my husband liked me in them.  I have to re-look at the dress and ask, "Who am I wearing this dress for?"  

I have cut out sugar and some more carbs.  I'm hoping to get a little healthier so, I'm finding other ways I would like to express who I am through my clothes.  I'm making sure that I have plenty of work-out clothes added to my closet  So... throw away the holey and mismatched socks.  Throw away those bras you know you won't wear but got on sale.  Do you have nail polish from when your children were born or older?  It's time.  It's time to get rid of them.  I'm not getting rid of everything.  I'm keeping the Justin Timberlake concert tee that I got with Cari.  I'm keeping the baseball tees that I inherited from my husband.  I wear them with leggings on cooler days.  I'm keeping some of the hoodies that I love to wear because it isn't always about how I look but about the clothes that make me feel comfortable on those days I need some solace.  

Take a moment, we are all liquid.  There are things that make up who we are that we will never part with and I think that it's okay but when your closets are bursting and you know you have to change, you need to go through your closet and figure it out because clothes can be important but they are not as important as loving God.  That's all for now..  Praise God.  

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