Tuesday, March 23, 2021

The Missing Decade

This may sound crazy but I think I lost a decade.  I mean, I am the age that I am but I somehow regressed a whole decade.  I have been thinking about when it happened and I think it was some time in the 90's.  It took me about three years longer than I needed to graduate from college.  I tried going to grad school but then I decided that I wanted to be a singer and instead, I worked.  I worked a 9-5 job and then worked on my demo.  I went on auditions.  I auditioned for Rent and for movies.  I took headshots and photos to be a beautiful plus side model.  I didn't realize that you had to be taller to be a model.  

You see, Santi made me think that I could do anything.  It didn't help that my father supported me as well in anything and everything that I wanted to try.  I graduated from college at 25 years old.  I hung out with some younger people so, I thought I was younger.  My father died when I was 26 years old, almost 27 and I looked about 10 years younger.  I worked as a secretary that didn't need a bachelor's to get.  I think that this is when I lost my decade.  Hanging out as an alumni member of my sorority with younger women diluted me into believing that I was ten years younger than I actually was.  

I remember the pop music.  As an older person I was hypnotized by The Backstreet Boys and later on, NSYNC.  Man, did I love the grunge stuff too!  I'm telling you, I was convinced, CONVINCED that I was younger than I actually was.  Justin Timberlake's solo album came out 2002.  I think that the official lost decade was when I was 23 to 33.  I think I just reset and then at 33 I went off with life as if I was 23.  In this decade long bubble I had a blast.  It was quite the transition!

I'm thinking of transitions now.  I can't afford to lose another decade.  It's really crazy the stuff that is coming up but I am calm and excited to see what is the next transition.  Praise the Lord!

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