I sit here in peace. My coffee is just the right temperature. I take a deep breath. I am still. I mean to tell you that I am small. I can already hear some of you start telling me something about myself. "Elle, don't say that you are..." I am, who God made me to be. I am nothing apart from Him. I try to empty myself out so that there is less of me and more of Him. I pray that the good you see in me is God. I know I am a mess. I want to let you into my messy life. I want you here with me to see that everything that is happening to me is not me. I want you on the ground floor. So that when you go to God with your messy life you can be still and know that He will do for you wonderful miraculous things. So when you have your chips up in the air, that you can be still and at peace. There is no peace like God's peace. It is a peace that passes all understanding (Philippians 4:7).
What will happen, will happen; let the chips fall where they may. I pray to always remember God in my life. He is infinitely better at things than I am. I have been using Psalm 16 as my prayer. It goes like this:
Preserve me, O God, for in You I put my trust.
O my soul, you have said to the Lord,
"You are my Lord,
My goodness is nothing apart from You."
As for the saints who are on the earth,
"They are excellent ones, in whom all is my delight."
Their sorrows shall be multiplied who hasten after another god;
Their drink offerings of blood I will not offer,
Nor take up their names on my lips.
O Lord, You are the portion of my inheritance and my cup;
You maintain my lot.
The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places;
Yes, I have a good inheritance.
I will bless the Lord who has given me counsel;
My heart also instructs me in the night seasons.
I have set the Lord always before me;
Because He is at my right hand I shall not be moved.
Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoices;
My flesh also will rest in hope.
For You will not leave my soul in Sheol,
Nor will You allow Your Holy One to see corruption.
You will show me the path of life;
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.